21 Dec What is the Real Job of a Mom?
As we get ready for the Christmas weekend. I started reflecting on most of my kids coming home and how to meet all of their needs. It is always tough when you bring everyone together that live away and have different expectations. It doesn’t stop at age 3 or 10 or 30 years old. What about a mom’s primary job? It’s not cooking dinner, changing diapers, helping your first grader with his spelling each night or your grown kids saving money.
The most important assignment a mom has is to nurture her children.
But what does that mean, exactly? Most of us have a vague notion about what being nurtured feels like, but here are a few specifics I found online to help me better understand the role of being a better mom.
A nurturing mom goes beyond being the “maintenance person” in a child’s life. She doesn’t just keep a child clean, fed, warm, and dry. She also helps enable her children to develop fully by pouring life into them. She models joy and passion. Nurturing is filling your child up with aliveness. Believing they can do anything they set their hearts into.
It’s not a joyless, self-sacrificing caricature of Betty Crocker. A nurturing mom takes time to play, read, and take pictures when the toddler’s got food all over them instead of in the mouth. She enters the child’s world to see things from his or her perspective, even if it means the carpets don’t get vacuumed for a while. She provides empathetic understanding from a position of strength and support. That’s true whether she’s dealing with a toddler or a teen.
Like dads, though, moms have a natural urge to protect their children. That can lead them to cross the line between nurturing and unsuccessful attempts at control.
I learned that holding out for what might be right to me doesn’t always get the results I want. In the end no one is winning. By letting go, listening and being excepting. Can bring more joy. Something we could all use more for of these days.
You can’t control the results, but you can stir in the right ingredients. Having a son who is a chef makes it easier for me to understand that some recipes go well and some may not. You can seek to know your children as individuals, different as they might be, and bring out the best in each. You can demonstrate by example how to explore life with zest and express the unique gifts God provides each of us. Your nurturing can blossom in emotional and spiritual growth.
Before you feel burdened with a mile-long list you can never follow through on, let me be quick to say that nurturing is not about “doing it all” or doing it perfectly. It’s about doing the best you can — without losing yourself or driving yourself crazy because your own needs aren’t taken care of. You won’t be able to nurture your children if you’re exhausted from burning the candle at both ends.
So please take care of yourself this holiday season, too. You need aliveness in order to pass it on to your teenagers. Take this year to be more happy and healthy. Maybe join us for one of our Fit-Family Boot Camp classes. You will feel healthier while your kids get fit and have tons of fun!